history

My Regrets

As I reconcile my life, I have come to the conclusion that my biggest regret is that I could have been friendlier than what I was and kept in touch with friends throughout my life.

In my young years I was scared. Life scared me. I was afraid to try things and go places. The first day of kindergarten was traumatic. All those strange kids and a new environment really scared me. For safety reasons my mother walked me to school and would be waiting for me when school was out. Telling me to “don’t talk to strangers” didn’t help me either. I survived and went to junior high and high school next. During that time, I made many friends and did what was normal for the period. Unfortunately, high school was a difficult time in my life. I guess it was the hormonal change and just the period of growing up. But, during that time I was angry and mad. I was mad at myself, my parents and everyone around me. I do not know why. I graduated from high school, and I never attended one high school reunion. I never kept track of any high school friends.

On to full time employment and a period of army time and making friends. On to married life and raising children, making more friends. Life continues and retirement happens and a move to a new home. More friends.

I have had many friends throughout my life. However, my biggest regret is I never kept in touch with the friends. Once a period of life is over, I would lose contact with the friends. My wife Dee has kept contact with friends throughout her life. If fact she is having lunch with three from her grade school tomorrow.

Therefore, my biggest regret is that I never kept in contact with friends out of my past and I could have been friendlier than what I was.

Daily writing prompt
Write about a time when you didn’t take action but wish you had. What would you do differently?
View all responses

Just be Myself

For most of my life I have tried to be something I was not. Many times, through life I heard “You should be like, whatever name you want to insert.” In younger years I heard; you should be more like your brother. Just because he is five years older than me, I should be like him? I guess I was a handful when I was young. Going to school I hear the same thing. You should be more like Johnny. At church I hear you are a sinner and should be more like the saints and apostles. Well, I got the picture, I should be somebody I am not and be somebody that fits in the surrounding society.

My teenage years were very difficult for me. For some reason I was angry and mad all the time. I hated myself and my situation. Was it because I was trying to be somebody I was not or was it just the hormonal change that everyone goes through during that age. One will never know.

I was drafted into the army later and looking back now I think this is one of the best things that happened to me in that period. This was in the Viet Nam era but fortunately my service period was served in Germany instead of Viet Nam unlike the seven other men drafted on that day. They all went to Viet Nam. Why I went to Germany and not Viet Nam is something I will never know. In the service you meet all kinds of people from many different areas of the country. Because of that I realized that the human race is not that bad. All the ones I met were basically good and were just trying to get through the challenges in front of them.

I have spent maybe two thirds of life trying to be somebody that I am not. You may believe this or not, but, one day I was taking a walk around the greenbelt near our home. There was nobody around and I was just having some silent time to my own. Then this loud voice came out and spoke. “Tom stop trying to be somebody else, just be yourself! Your purpose in life is to be yourself!” After that event I have decided to just be myself. Since that time, I been at peace since and am actually enjoying just being myself. I even like myself. This is one positive change I have made in my life.

Daily writing prompt
Describe one positive change you have made in your life.
View all responses

I Am Addicted to Computers and Internet

Since 1994 I have been addicted to Computers. I bought my first desktop computer from a co-worker who built computers. I think I spent around Seven hundred dollars for it. Those were the days of floppy disk drives, 32k modems, Windows 3.1 and cathode ray monitors. Those were the days where dependability was not a strong feature. Remember, “The Blue Screen of Death”? Storage capacity was below a gigabyte.

Technology has really changed in the last thirty years. Now they have storage in terabytes, thumb drives larger than older desktop hard drives. Access to the internet by many means instead of the phone line. Solid state hard drives. Ever drop a laptop and the mechanical hard drive was killed? Desktop and laptop sales are decreasing because smartphones are becoming so versatile. They say this technology is just the beginning. What will we see in next ten years?

I cannot imagine what my life would be like without computers and internet. My handwriting looks like chicken scratching. My typing accuracy was never very good. It was quite a feat to type a page without a typo. With the help of the computer and Microsoft Office of Word, PowerPoint, and Excel I can look like a professional, which I am not. I am able to share my thoughts and memories thanks to the computer and the internet. Although, I spend way too much time on the internet. I never did get into gaming. The most I play on the computer are solitaire.

Daily writing prompt
What activities do you lose yourself in?
View all responses

My Favorite Movies

I have two favorite movies and have watched them many times. I have the DVD for both them and pop them in when I need an uplifting moment. Also, if I happen to be watching or streaming tv and I stumble onto them I start watching.

The first is, How the West was won. This is a 1962 movie originally filmed in Cinerama. This was a process of projecting on three screens, and it was supposed to give you a panoramic view. I was nice, but you could see the splits of the three screens. When they remastered the movie for the DVD the split screens are not so obvious. The storyline was about a family that migrated from the east and migrated to the western frontier. It had stories about the Civil War. How the train expansion helped speed up the expansion into the frontier and stories taking place in San Franscisco and California. The music in this movie was great! It was an important part to the success of the movie.

My other favorite is Patton. This is a 1970 movie about the experience of General Patton during World War Two. This is my favorite movie about World War Two. There is Saving Private Ryan, Battle of the Bulge and many more. However, Patton is my favorite. For some reason I have a large interest in this war. I don’t know why. Maybe it was because I was born at the beginning and my parents talked a lot about the war when I was growing up. I have watched every episode on the History Channel about the battles, and Hitler with the Third Reich. Maybe I am trying to understand how people became so dark to do what atrocities they did then. In my life there has been World War Two, Korean War, Viet Nam War, The Gulf war in 1990, and the Iraq War in 2003. I know I left some out. My life has been full of wars. However, my most interest has been WWII.

Daily writing prompt
What movies or TV series have you watched more than 5 times?
View all responses