writing

My Regrets

As I reconcile my life, I have come to the conclusion that my biggest regret is that I could have been friendlier than what I was and kept in touch with friends throughout my life.

In my young years I was scared. Life scared me. I was afraid to try things and go places. The first day of kindergarten was traumatic. All those strange kids and a new environment really scared me. For safety reasons my mother walked me to school and would be waiting for me when school was out. Telling me to “don’t talk to strangers” didn’t help me either. I survived and went to junior high and high school next. During that time, I made many friends and did what was normal for the period. Unfortunately, high school was a difficult time in my life. I guess it was the hormonal change and just the period of growing up. But, during that time I was angry and mad. I was mad at myself, my parents and everyone around me. I do not know why. I graduated from high school, and I never attended one high school reunion. I never kept track of any high school friends.

On to full time employment and a period of army time and making friends. On to married life and raising children, making more friends. Life continues and retirement happens and a move to a new home. More friends.

I have had many friends throughout my life. However, my biggest regret is I never kept in touch with the friends. Once a period of life is over, I would lose contact with the friends. My wife Dee has kept contact with friends throughout her life. If fact she is having lunch with three from her grade school tomorrow.

Therefore, my biggest regret is that I never kept in contact with friends out of my past and I could have been friendlier than what I was.

Daily writing prompt
Write about a time when you didn’t take action but wish you had. What would you do differently?
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My Eyes are Killing Me.

It is that time of the year again. Spring allergies have attacked me full force. A couple of days ago my nose started to run and I looked around and sure enough, the trees were starting to leaf up and the fruit trees were all filled with blossoms. I thought, oh no, it is the time of year for itchy, scratchy, red eyes.

Before I turned fifty, I didn’t have allergies, but as I got older, they started to attack me and the older I age the worse they get. I read that this is a characteristic of the aging process in some people. I guess I am stuck with the problem. Fortunately, it only lasts a couple of weeks and once the trees are finished doing their thing, I am ok.

Over the counter medication such as Alavert and Claritin work for the runny nose discomfort and the runny nose can be tolerated. The itchy, burning, running eyes are another issue. I don’t know how many eyes drops and ointments I have tried and to no relief. The best that has worked for me at the moment is Thera Tears and Pataday. Unfortunately, my itchy eyes bother me for about two weeks. I have learned to not rub my eyes no matter what. That only makes it worse. It sure has been difficult to refrain from an automatic response.

I have talked to eye doctors, and they just told me allergies are caused by your immune system and it thinks the pollen is a threat to your eyes and attempts to protect your body from infection. Apparently, they do not have any suggestions for the discomfort. one consolation is that it only lasts a couple of weeks, and it will all be over.

Time to go back being uncomfortable and grouchy.

Back To Writing

The decision was made last summer. I have had WordPress site since 2009 and I let it go dormant until last summer. I also opened up a Sub Stack account at the same time since I forgot that I had this account. Now I am posting on both accounts.

Over a year ago I had a life-threatening event and I thought I was going to breath my last breath. Miraculously I survived this serious event. My blood clot During the three days in ICU, I had plenty of time to search for the purpose of my survival. I still feel there is a reason I was given a second chance. After six months of recuperating and still searching for the reason I survived, and I had the thought maybe I should share my thoughts, ideas and stories in a blog type format. I heard about Sub Stack on a news article and started blogging and then I remembered about my WordPress account and revitalized it. I now have over 200 posts on WordPress and over 50 on Sub Stack. Some posts are the same on both sites.

I also Have a Blurb account. blurb.com/user/tomtreloar that I have also had for a long time with a selection of books I have published. I then discovered that they now have a magazine publishing section, and this would fit perfectly for me. Rambling Magazine

Recently Writers Digest started following me on X (formerly twitter) and this news excited me. People must be noticing this mere spec in this gigantic universe. Now I have seen about freelance copywriting. I am retired and it appears that my finances will last longer than me, so I do not need the money. However, I will consider the opportunity if it happens to come my way.

In conclusion, deciding to resurrect writing and posting has been a good decision for me. It gives me something else to do and I am learning more about the internet and software used. Where this all goes, who knows?

Daily writing prompt
Describe a decision you made in the past that helped you learn or grow.
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Hormones in High School

Here I am 14 1/2 years old. I continued from junior high school (now known as middle school) and started high school in the fall. The junior high school was walking distance from home. The high school was far enough away that I had to take the public bus to get there. I have used public transportation before so that wasn’t scary. The size of the high school and the number of students were scary though.

In junior high there were boys and girls. No big deal. The girls ran around with the girls and the boys ran around with the boys. You did start to notice a little that the girls shape started to change a little bit. Maybe they should just stop eating so much.

After summer break you and start high school and see the girls from your junior high and think “WOW!” they have really become attractive and interesting. Also, during that time, you look down and see all this hair grown between your legs. When did that happen? It wasn’t there yesterday. You wake up in the morning and your male plumbing is acting and feeling very strange.

In high school, there is Junior and Seniors and you are exposed to street sex talk. There is a difference between boys and girls. One form of entertainment was to go the local drugstore and look at the Playboy magazines from the top of the display shelfs. WOW! The female body is really exciting and desirable. You want to join in on this excitement.

My mother sees the change and knows it is time for the traditional home sex education session. She goes through the biological difference of man and woman. She also takes the opportunity to bring up the religion aspect and reminds me that sex outside of marriage is very sinful and should be avoided. She reminds me that women can get pregnant very easily. This was the time before medical birth control and the condom was known to be not very reliable. Finally, she tells me that many women try to get pregnant so they can get their Mrs. degree. She also told me. “Tom do not let your hormones lead your life and change it that you may regret sometime later.” This really alarmed me and for a long time I thought, will I ever know if she married for love or married me just to get a Mrs. degree?

This is what I learned during high school, not in high school.

Daily writing prompt
Describe something you learned in high school.
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I Survived the March 14 Record Snowstorm

For three days the news media has concentrated on the gigantic storm coming to Denver metro area. It finally started to rain last afternoon and turned to snow sometime during the night. Woke up with five inches of snow this morning. Some foothill locations got forty inches. During the day the lights flickered occasionally but never went out. However, there were reports that around 50,000 were without power due to broken trees taking out power lines.

We live in a community of forty-four homes and the HOA handles snow removal and received an email that snow removal will be done after the snow stops. Well, it has been snowing all day and I hope there is not a medical emergency in the circle. There have been very few auto tracks on the street, and I don’t know if a fire truck or ambulance could navigate the amount of snow on the streets. plus, none of the driveways or walks are cleaned. Wonder if someone has a medical emergency and emergency treatment cannot get in, can the HOA be sued for neglect of duty? Since this post was started Thursday night I will finish it Friday.

Here it is Friday morning, no power outages, no fallen trees or branches. We still are snowed in though. The HOA crew has not done a thing on the snow removal. I have thirteen inches of snow on the front porch. The city did plow down the middle of the street. However, that leaves a twenty-four-inch pile of snow in front of the driveway. No way could I drive over or through that pile. I am over eighty and no way can I remove that pile of heavy wet snow. I guess I am snowbound for a while.

I Am Addicted to Computers and Internet

Since 1994 I have been addicted to Computers. I bought my first desktop computer from a co-worker who built computers. I think I spent around Seven hundred dollars for it. Those were the days of floppy disk drives, 32k modems, Windows 3.1 and cathode ray monitors. Those were the days where dependability was not a strong feature. Remember, “The Blue Screen of Death”? Storage capacity was below a gigabyte.

Technology has really changed in the last thirty years. Now they have storage in terabytes, thumb drives larger than older desktop hard drives. Access to the internet by many means instead of the phone line. Solid state hard drives. Ever drop a laptop and the mechanical hard drive was killed? Desktop and laptop sales are decreasing because smartphones are becoming so versatile. They say this technology is just the beginning. What will we see in next ten years?

I cannot imagine what my life would be like without computers and internet. My handwriting looks like chicken scratching. My typing accuracy was never very good. It was quite a feat to type a page without a typo. With the help of the computer and Microsoft Office of Word, PowerPoint, and Excel I can look like a professional, which I am not. I am able to share my thoughts and memories thanks to the computer and the internet. Although, I spend way too much time on the internet. I never did get into gaming. The most I play on the computer are solitaire.

Daily writing prompt
What activities do you lose yourself in?
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My Favorite Movies

I have two favorite movies and have watched them many times. I have the DVD for both them and pop them in when I need an uplifting moment. Also, if I happen to be watching or streaming tv and I stumble onto them I start watching.

The first is, How the West was won. This is a 1962 movie originally filmed in Cinerama. This was a process of projecting on three screens, and it was supposed to give you a panoramic view. I was nice, but you could see the splits of the three screens. When they remastered the movie for the DVD the split screens are not so obvious. The storyline was about a family that migrated from the east and migrated to the western frontier. It had stories about the Civil War. How the train expansion helped speed up the expansion into the frontier and stories taking place in San Franscisco and California. The music in this movie was great! It was an important part to the success of the movie.

My other favorite is Patton. This is a 1970 movie about the experience of General Patton during World War Two. This is my favorite movie about World War Two. There is Saving Private Ryan, Battle of the Bulge and many more. However, Patton is my favorite. For some reason I have a large interest in this war. I don’t know why. Maybe it was because I was born at the beginning and my parents talked a lot about the war when I was growing up. I have watched every episode on the History Channel about the battles, and Hitler with the Third Reich. Maybe I am trying to understand how people became so dark to do what atrocities they did then. In my life there has been World War Two, Korean War, Viet Nam War, The Gulf war in 1990, and the Iraq War in 2003. I know I left some out. My life has been full of wars. However, my most interest has been WWII.

Daily writing prompt
What movies or TV series have you watched more than 5 times?
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Superstition Versus Faith

from Wikipedia, “A superstition is any belief or practice considered by non-practitioners to be irrational or supernatural, attributed to fate or magic, perceived supernatural influence, or fear of that which is unknown.”

Faith is confidence or trust in a person, thing, or concept. In the context of religion, faith is “belief in God or in the doctrines or teachings of religion”. According to Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary.

Throughout my life I have been exposed to many superstitions. For example, do no step on the cracks in a sidewalk, brings bad luck. Break a mirror, you experience seven years of bad luck. Four leaf clovers bring good luck. Friday the 13th is a bad day. My oldest son was born on Friday the 13th, I can’t say that was bad luck, but good. I could go on for hours about superstitious encounters in my life.

I am a product of a religious mother and grandmother. They were very religious Catholics. I was raised a Catholic. I suppose you could say baptism is evolved around a superstition. If you are not baptized, you die with original sin and will never see heaven. I was taught if you die with a mortal sin, you do not go to heaven. You should be in the state of grace to receive the sacrament of marriage and so on.

I have had strange spiritual events in my life. My mother had a very painful medical death, and she was terrified of dying. How could this be? She was a very religious person, and all this faith did not prepare her for death and the other side. This really bothered me that she was so unprepared. About a week after her service I had a dream, my mother was there sitting in her favorite chair and said, “Tom everything is good. Do not worry about me, continue your life!? I was put at peace and my confusion resolved.

I had another dream about this girl that I have not seen or heard of for over forty years. She said in my dream, “Tom, you and I were meant to be together. If we would have ended up together our lives would have been totally different.” Yes, that bothered me. After forty or more years why did I have a dream about her? This bothered me for a couple of months, and I finally went to my alumni newsletters and got here married name and made an internet search and found out that she died three days prior to my dream. This is spooky. However, it did convince me that death is not the end.

Another event happened in the last ten to fifteen years. I was going for a walk around the park and this loud voice came and said, “Tom, stop trying to be somebody else! Just be yourself! That is what you are expected to be! Ever since, that I am Just Myself!

So, is this superstition or faith? I guess it all depends on what the definition a person has of superstition and faith. I know one thing for sure. My spiritual events have impacted my life more than all religious teaching and superstitions.

Daily writing prompt
Are you superstitious?
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100 Years Ago

Dear Tom, it’s hard to believe that a hundred years ago you came into this world. It was shortly after the beginning of World War Two. You were only three years old when the war was over, so I am sure you do not remember much about this war. However, remember standing in front of the home and watching the military vehicles driving down the busy street a block and a half away going to Denver Federal Center maybe five miles west of home. It seemed like hours watching all those trucks going by. I am sure your parents talked about the war a lot when you were very young. I am sure their conversations left a lasting impression on you.

Remember your mother walking you to school when you started grade school. There was a busy street between home and school, and she wanted you to be safe. Miss Kusckan, Mrs. Keebler and Miss Lee are teachers one never forgets. All the boys had a crush on Miss Lee. She was young, blond and so sweet. Everyone’s dream was shattered when Mr. Groutt, the math teacher married her.

Life continues with junior high and high school. Those years were tough years. Our hormones were acting up and strange. Unfortunately, those were years of anger and hatred. We were mad at ourselves and everyone else in our life. Smoking and drinking became an important part of life.

Then came full time employment and the army. Remember when you took the military oath after being drafted and the night long train trip to Ft Leonard Missouri. The military sure changed your life and outlook about other people. Looking back at this time you learned so much about people by meeting people from all parts of the country, New York City, Florida New Orleans, California, Chicago, just to name a few. If Viet Nam wasn’t staring you in the face, you may have made the army your career.

Back from your military duty you were looking for love and someone to have a family and begin the life every young red-blooded American wanted. Your desires come true, and you meet a young lady from Nebraska. Then marriage, a home, two sons and good job. Life could not be better. Unfortunately, this dream came to an end after about eleven years.

Divorced, unemployed because your job was eliminated. These were challenging times for you. But you did not give up. During those times you met your future. You met her in a divorce support group. Ten years later marriage happened. you have now been together for over forty years. Yes, there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

Remember a year ago you were at deaths door and Doctor Death was holding the door open. You defied the odds that only three to five percent survive this kind of procedure and forty to fifty percent die within six months after the procedure due to some other illness. It was just not your time. Your journey is not finished.

After eighteen more additional years I am wishing you a Happy 100th Birthday! You have had quite the journey. You have met and interacted with thousands of individuals through this life and learned a lot. I must remind you that the purpose in life is to learn. Learn as much as you can in your life!

Sincerely, Your Subconscious.

Daily writing prompt
Write a letter to your 100-year-old self.
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I Do Not Have a Favorite Shoe

Sorry, I did not have a favorite shoe. To me a shoe is a necessity not a luxury. Life would be tough without shoes. Looking at scenes during Jesus’s era and seeing those open sandals and bare feet. No Thank You!

I remember when going to grade school high top tennis shoes were the type to have. You just didn’t fit in if you did not have high top tennis shoes. My mother would shop at Thom McAnn’s shoe store, and we always got our shoes there. Are they even around anymore? A new pair of shoes always gave you a blister somewhere on your foot. When I started in corporate management Florsheim shoes were the brand to have. I had one pair, and they were the worse shoes in my life. After a short period of time, they were not comfortable and lasted less than six months. That was the last Florsheim I bought.

In the army I received two pairs of combat boots and one pair of class A shoes. Since I have a small foot, size eight, I received combat boots made for WWII They had a date of 1944 in the boot, and this was twenty years after the war. The boots received the most attention in my entire life. They always needed to be shined and one pair had to be spit shined for guard duty. They lasted many years after I got out of the army. Probably the reason they lasted was because I did not wear them that often.

I never did get into all these designer shoes or sport shoes like Nike, New Balance, Adidas or others. After I married, I accepted shoes from Target, K-Mart, or Walmart. Cared less about brand name but how they feel and wear. I am still in that position now.

In conclusion, I never had a favorite pair of shoes and never walked “The Yellow Brick Road” in them.

Daily writing prompt
Tell us about your favorite pair of shoes, and where they’ve taken you.
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Time for Spring

I have king sized cabin fever! I am sick and tired of the cold days. I am tired of the funny winter hats. My hands are always cold. I miss sitting out on the porch enjoying the sunshine.

I received a battery-operated hand warmer last Christmas. The name on it is Zippo. I am sure many vets remember the name Zippo. In my military days everyone had a Zippo lighter. I guess the sales of lighters these days are not that high, so they had to diversify. The hand warmer is nice though. Rechargeable and you can plug into your smartphone and use it in case your smartphone battery dies.

Denver Metro had a record-breaking snowfall recently and that did not help at all. I did not go out of the home for three days and that does not help cabin fever one bit.

The older I become the more I cannot tolerate cold winter months. If I was twenty years younger, I may consider moving to a warmer winter month state. However, I am sure family would convince us to not even consider it. I guess all that leaves is to moan and groan about the cold months.

I need a break!

Daily writing prompt
Do you need a break? From what?
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Vintage computer

A long long time ago, 1994 to be exact. I purchased my first computer. It was purchased from a fellow worker who built computers from scratch. If memory is correct, I spent $700 for this computer. We are so spoiled these days comparing this computer back in 1994. The most time spent was waiting for the computer to compute.

Windows 3.1 was the operating system. The transfer system was a floppy disc. The capacity was under 500 kilobits. This was before CD disc drives. New programs came on a collection of floppy discs, 2, 3, maybe 4 or 5. During those days everyone shared programs. Copyright license laws were useless. “Hey Joe, I got this new program want a copy?” It had 2 megabytes of RAM. Gigabyte memories were not even thought of. The hard drive was way below 1000 megabytes. No such thing as USB or thumb drives. Oh, how spoiled we have become.

You have a computer, so you need a printer to be complete. A printer is added. More memory is used for the printer. the computer becomes slower. Oh, I am getting into the computing thing, a flatbed scanner is needed. More memory is needed. The computer becomes slower. Somewhere in that era combination printers/scanners start showing up.

To be a computer guru you need a modem to get online. 32k modems were the thing and the big event was when the new revolutionary 64k modem came out. Phone line connection only, no Wi Fi at this time. you get online and wait, wait and wait some more. Oh, all this took more memory, and your computer became slower and slower.

If I remember correctly, I kept this computer until after Y2K. Most equipment did not have facilities to handle anything beyond 1999. I forget how this problem was solved. But I do remember it created a lot of panic. Since my first computer I have lost track of how many computers I have purchased in the last 30 years. I am sure it has been over ten. Most have been Dell or HP. A relative had an Acer and all they had was problems. I favor Dell over HP. Never had an Apple so I can’t say much about them. These days you have tablets, iPad, smartphones, smart tv’s and others I can’t think of now. I can speculate that someday the desktop or tower computers will be discontinued because of the declining sales for these items.

On my first computer back in 1994 there was a financial program called Quicken. I became accustomed to using it and still use it today. Naturally it has been updated and revised many times, but I still enjoy and rely on it. I have been through hard drive crashes, virus attacks, incompatible hardware, software and running out of memory. It has been a fun and enjoyable trip through the land of computers.

Daily writing prompt
Write about your first computer.
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Heights

I hate heights. Always have and probably will for the rest of my life. I don’t know why. It is just some phobia I have. I can climb a ladder and roam around on a single-story roof, but anything higher than that I begin to get nervous and the higher it goes the more nervous I get even to the state of panic. Oh, I can fly in a passenger jet or go in high skyscraper buildings. I have been to the top of the pre-9-11 World Trade Center and the Empire State Building and felt a little uncomfortable but no more. It is just that vision of being on the edge and viewing the ground way down there with no fence or railing to stop me. However, I could not even go up the Space Needle in Seattle. I stayed on the ground.

When I was young, I had dreams of falling off a high spot or being pushed. I always woke up before I ever hit the ground. Someone said to me when I was young that if I ever hit the ground in my dreams I would have died. I don’t know if that is a fact or not. I wonder if that is a reason. Maybe in a previous life I fell off or was pushed. I am afraid of heights even today. The only consolation I have is that many people have the same fear of heights I have.

I would never make a paratrooper. Who would want to jump out of a perfectly good airplane?

Bloganuary writing prompt
What’s the thing you’re most scared to do? What would it take to get you to do it?
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Complaints, Complaints, Complaints

What is happening to this world? Across the world you see unrest with massive demonstrations, violence, armed conflicts with many deaths. Russia and Ukraine are in a war. Gaza and Israel conflict goes on. China is threatening Taiwan. Three US soldiers are killed in Jordan. Farmers in Scandinavia and Paris are having massive demonstrations.

On a local level. The actual number is not actually known, but millions of people have come across the border. This is putting a tremendous burden on the health system and social services. In large cities crime is rising. You see videos of smash and grabs where large swarms of people just go in and grab anything they want. Homeless camps are springing up everywhere. Fentanyl deaths in the past years are scary.

Inflation is alive and well. For example, I recently purchased a large package of toilet paper, and the cost was twenty-two dollars. Six months ago, the cost was eighteen dollars. That is an over twenty percent increase. My property taxes just increased nine-hundred dollars. These increases are pinching my fixed income.

In politics all you see and hear is anger and hate. There is no longer a civil discussion on the issues. All they do is attack their opponent. Truthfulness is dead. Anything is said to fit their agenda. There is no accountability for out and out lies. Many government entities have been weaponized, and they use their authority to push the agenda. Equal justice under the law is currently missing.

So, what is a mere mortal like you and me do? Complain, complain, and complain some more. Another very important thing to do is, learn more about the agenda these politicians are pushing on us. Finally, vote in November.

Bloganuary writing prompt
What do you complain about the most?
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The lottery and me.

First of all, to win the lottery, you have to play the lottery. I don’t play the lottery. I can’t remember the last time I threw away money to buy a lottery ticket. I have many friends and relatives that faithfully purchase lottery tickets every week. Has anyone won? Not that I know of. When the lottery first started, I played the scam. I think the most numbers I ever got was two. This convinced me that the chances are slim next to none.

Therefore, theoretically if I ever won millions I would disappear and change my life totally. First, I would acquire legal advice and a financial advisor. I have heard that these multimillionaires suddenly have relatives come out of the woodwork and friends that you haven’t heard or seen from for years. I want people to be around me for who I am, not what I have. Charities and good causes would get a portion of my good fortune. The largest concern I have will I be any happier or complete than what I am now.

My life has been full and rewarding. I am in my seasoned years and have had more good things and people than bad events. No, I am not rich. I am just a mere mortal that is living comfortable, happy, and that would be hard to replace. It would be a tough job for those millions to replace what I have now. Therefore, I do not intend to start playing the lottery anytime soon.

Bloganuary writing prompt
What would you do if you won the lottery?
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Decision

I have been retired over sixteen years and all my time is leisure time. After sixty years of working earning a living, raising and providing for a family I am entitled to leisure time. Since I retired every day is Saturday! I wake up and think what will today bring just like I did when working but just one day of the week then. Now it is every day.

With that I have enjoyed doing many different things at different times. Before I retired, I had passion for model trains and this passion went through its course. Since I have retired and moved into our new home the workshop, I have in my basement. I spent a lot of time. However, that interest has decreased lately. Of course, I am aging like everyone else, and this is affecting what I can do and not do.

Lately I have been spending a lot of time writing and reminiscing about things that happened to me. I have become active in WordPress again. I had this account since 2010 but became active in it since August of last year. I have dabbled in podcasts and videos. Maybe someday I can say they are pretty good.

In conclusion, it will be close to a year since I experienced a life-threatening blood clot. I was standing in front of Death’s door and Doctor Death was holding the door open. I surprised everyone and beat the odds. What I enjoy the most since that event is living!          https://tomt2.com/2023/08/10/my-blood-clot/

Bloganuary writing prompt
What do you enjoy doing most in your leisure time?
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Life is Fun

I have been retired for seventeen years. Since 2006 I haven’t worked any job. Pensions, Social Security and savings have provided my wife and I with everything we need. Most of the things I do is for fun or enjoyment. Life has been good. There have been medical issues but all in all life has been good to us. Here are the first five things that I thought of to have fun.

  1. the most interesting thing at the present time is writing. I enjoy writing and reminiscing about events in my life. That is the purpose of writing on Word Press. I do not expect to ever receive any kind of financial compensation for my writing time. I just enjoy it. I am glad I discovered the daily blog prompt. This is ideal for my random ramblings.
  2. I enjoy eating out at restaurants. it gives us a reason to get out of the house for a while and interact with people. Humans are social creatures and social contact is necessary for healthy living. I had a job where I would have contact with people that spent a lot of time alone. You could tell they were lacking social contact in their life, and they were craving for this necessity. They would try to keep me there as long as possible just to have contact with another human being.
  3. Puzzle books are fun for me. I enjoy crossword puzzles and sudoku. I am not a big fan of word search. However, my wife enjoys word search puzzles though. One must keep their mind active and working.
  4. I have a workshop in my basement. I enjoy repairing items around the house and building small items. For a while I was into bird houses. I found out though that there is just not much demand for bird houses, and I was floating in bird houses.
  5. I like to grow stuff. All my life I have had a garden where I lived except the short time I lived in an apartment. Flowers, vines. and vegetables are on my list of plants. We sure enjoy fresh tomatoes during the summertime. Unfortunately, our home has growing space, but it is too shady, and I haven’t had much success here.

These are the first five things that came to mind. I have many more things I do for fun.  

Bloganuary writing prompt
List five things you do for fun.
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I don’t Have a Pet

It has been many years since we had a pet. But we do have many fond memories of Missy. She was a peekapoo and we got her when she was just a puppy. Never weighed over five pounds. The only time she got mad at us was when we took her to get spayed. If looks could kill, we would be dead. But she forgave us and was a loving, friendly, and loyal companion for over thirteen years.

when Missy was a puppy, she jumped off the couch once and broke he front leg. Taking her to the vet and watching her walk around with her little cast created a bond and love that cannot be explained. When we had pork chops, Missy got the bone. She knew and just sat there waiting for her bone. What a fond memory. After many years of love and enjoyment she began to show her age. One morning I let her outside to do her business. I always went out to keep an eye on her since we had an open yard. She finished and was walking around just sniffing stuff and she looked up at me and fell over dead.

Missy will always be remembered. Throughout my life I had many pets, Ginger, Jughead, Boots, and many more. Missy was the best!

Bloganuary writing prompt
If you could make your pet understand one thing, what would it be?
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WHAT’S NEXT?

After my life-threatening blood clot, I thought “why was I given a second chance?” Lying flat on my back in ICU for three days gave me plenty of time to reconcile my life and think about “why was I given a second chance?” I concluded that there is something meant for me to do before going to the other side. I prayed and asked for help to make the right decision. To the best of my knowledge my prayers and request were never answered. I have the feeling that it is up to me to decide what direction to take. So here I am trying to decide, What’s Next?  

My second chance came in February of 2023. Recuperation was a slow process. It took about five months of being a couch potato before I felt like doing anything. I finally started to have more energy in June and received the desire to do more than just vegetate. My medication was adjusted, and the passing of time helped. During that time, I heard about substack.com on an internet news site or some talk show. I opened an account and started posting articles on the substack site. I have currently posted over thirty-five stories on substack. During that period after joining substack I remembered that I also had an old blog site on wordpress.com since 2009. Sure enough it was still there. As they say, “what you put on cyber space it is there forever.” I also started posting on WordPress too. Most of the articles are the same on each site. I just edited them to fit the site. Both sites have good points and other points that do not fit my objectives. You must remain active. If you do not post your audience disappears very quickly. They both have different audiences, and no one has ever commented that they saw me on the other site. 

The articles I have posted already are the ones I have wanted to share since my second chance of life. I do enjoy this endeavor and I will continue to publish.  

I could write about current events in a complicated country and world. There is the border, economy, politics, Ukraine, racism, sexism, gender, and many more issues to cover that I haven’t thought of now. Unfortunately, hatred and anger in these issues has destroyed any chance to have a civil and mean full sharing of thoughts and ideas. I have never seen the amount of hatred and anger in this country as there is now. I am over eighty seasoned years and do not want to get involved with hate and anger.  

I have come to the realization that I am just a speck in this gigantic universe. I am not an evangelist or a motivator. What I comment about will more than likely never have any large traffic draw. I am not doing this for money, and I could promote my site more than what I do. At least I am getting my thoughts out to cyber space instead of filing them in a file cabinet where my descendants will more than likely throw them away without even reading them. Maybe I have already done what I was meant to do after my life-threatening event.   

So, I will continue writing and commenting on anything this year.  

MEMORIES OF FAITH

https://tomt2.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/12/memories-of-faith.mp3 podcast

My first church 

The first church in my life was a Catholic church since my mother was a born and raised Catholic. I guess I can say my father did not have a practicing religion. He was raised a Baptist, but I would say he did not go to church services no more than ten times that I can remember. He never interfered with my mother raising my brother and I into the Catholic religion.  

First a little about the history of this church. The name was St. Rose of Lima Catholic Church. It was established in 1924 in an old Presbyterian church in west or southwest Denver. The original was a small grey stucco building, I would say about the size of a small country school building. I distinctly remember the two tall evergreen trees on both sides of the entrance to the church. 

When I was very young, I remember the parish priest, Father Grohman. He was a funny man and full of life. He was probably around 60 when I was young, 

In 1949 father Wogan became the parish priest. Strange man, I could never get close to him. It could have been the normal fear of authority at my young age, and he liked to show his authority. Father Wogan expanded the church. The old gray stucco building was torn down and a new church was built across the alley in 1949. I was seven years old at the time. This church was in the basement because in the next six years a school was built around the structure. In 1955 the school was dedicated and is still open. In 1963 a new church was built just east of the original church, and it is still being used even after the church was severely damaged in the flood of 1965.  

I received my first communion there and confirmation. It is hard to compare the religion what I was raised into the religion of today. In fact, I could say there is no comparison. For example, fear was a big factor. There was time when I compared God to the big accountant. He sat there with his big ledger pad and kept track of every time you sinned and acted human. It was tough getting into heaven those days. Today the game has changed and now I feel like I may have a chance. 

I am sure my past exposure has affected my faith and me. Just as my present exposure affects my faith. The faith I have is based on events happening throughout my life. My life has been a learning experience and the older I become the stronger my faith becomes. 

An influence of my faith 

My grandmother or the mother of my mother was an influence in my faith journey. Grandma was born in Germany and migrated to America when she was seven years old. I am not sure when she learned to read and write English. I do know that she had very little formal education because the migration to America was during her young years when she should have been learning the basics and then she had to go to work to help feed the family. Grandma married and had fourteen children. About half of them died in birth or at a very young age. Her husband died at a young age because of Asthma, and she was left with many children to feed and support. She had to take in laundry and scrub floors so the family could survive. They did not have community support programs during that time. As her children became older, they had to quit school and start work at a young age to help support the family. It sounded like it was a very difficult time. 

 Grandma lived with our family. I think she moved in with us when my parents bought their house. I remember her living with us until she passed away when I was sixteen years old. Her life was hard and a struggle.  

With that said, she was an influence in my faith journey because I never heard her complain about her struggles in life. She was a very religious person. I don’t know how many times a day she would pray. She went to church as often as she could and she always would say, “have faith, God will take care of you.” 

I remember on her deathbed when we would come to visit her, she would say, “you don’t have to come see me anymore. These two angels are here waiting to take me away and she would point in the direction of the corner of the room. To this day I believe she actually saw two angels waiting to take her away. 

Song of my faith 

Here I am searching my brain for a song that is instrumental in my faith. It is in there somewhere, but I am having a difficult time finding it. In fact, I am having a difficult time thinking of any song this is significant in my life. One of the first songs that came to thought of was “Ave Maria”. Why that song came to me first I cannot explain. It just came to mind that many Christmas Carols about Christ is instrumental to my faith. I do believe that Christ is the son of God and Christmas Carols do celebrate Christ’s coming into the world. “Silent Night”, “Away in the Manager”, and others give me a strange warm feeling when I hear them. However, that is just a period in the year. After the Christmas season these songs are not played until the beginning of the next Christmas season.  

I am looking for that one song that affects me throughout the entire year.  

There is one song that I truly love. This may sound strange, but that song is the theme song from “How the west was won”. When the words “the Promised Land” are sung it emphasizes or re-enforces my faith that there is a Promised Land beyond life on this earth. I know it is not a traditional religious song. I may not have a traditional song stored in my brain. Many times, I strongly feel that my faith is not from traditional organized religious practices but from subtle events and ideas that I have experienced. 

Icon of my faith 

Here I am trying to think about an icon of my faith. This is a tough subject for me because I see an icon as an inanimate object with no life. Whereas my faith is alive and vibrant. I can look at a cross and it brings the thought of suffering Christ did for mankind. However, there are other icons or stories that bring the same thoughts to mind. The cross is not the only center of point for these thoughts. 

Being from a Catholic raised environment statues were and still are big in the Catholic faith. I feel that the statues were attempts to remember an individual. They were before photography. I have never looked at a statue as an icon. 

What I am trying to say is that my faith is not dependent on some icon. My faith has come from lessons and teachings of the Christian religion throughout my life and events that have happened between me and the unknown.  

Religion of youth versus religion of adulthood 

What I am today is so much different than what I was in earlier periods of my life. For example, in my young years when I was indoctrinated into faith and religion. Everything was black and white. Or you might say it was either good or bad. You had to worry about the bad things or the sinful aspects of life. Much of religion was memorization, many aspects were just bad, don’t question it, just abide by it. 

As I became older in my journey of life, I attempted to abide by all these rules and regulations. It was tough and many times I questioned my worthiness. I was a sinner and walked around with a large case of guilt. Now that I look back at these misdeeds they now are not as bad as they were at the time. 

As life progressed and other events in my life took place my outlook on life and religion began to change. Religion and faith started to be an important part of everyday life. Whereas in younger years it was a hamper to being happy and feeling good about myself. 

So here I am now. I will never be an evangelist. Religion and faith are a difficult subject to discuss because so much of my faith is an internal gift and what I feel may not work for another. If I can’t relay my faith in words, what do I do? I resort to actions and displaying my faith with what I do. How I live and how I show love to others that cross into my journey of life.  

What is worship? 

Thinking about it I am sure everyone has a different concept and idea on this thought. I am sure no one will ever come up with a one definition that fits all. Even my thoughts on this subject tonight may change at a later time.  

I am feeling that worship is a conversation with God. I have heard that worship is just praising God. Sorry, this does not work for me. I have been in many one-sided conversations, and they can be very boring and useless. To have a good conversation both parties need to be involved and share thoughts and feelings. Many will say that God does not talk to you. It may be that you expect to receive the response like you communicate to God. Is God communicating to you in subtle ways that is not in the form of traditional communication? This could be one of the mysteries of worship. Worship can be a seven-day event, not just an event reserved for church service time. It just dawned on me that I might just link worship with prayer. 

Conclusion  

In conclusion, the above subjects were writing prompts in a writing group from 2009. I brushed them off and refreshed them. It has been fourteen years since they were written, and a lot has happened in my faith.  

First, we have become more active in the Lutheran branch of Christianity it amazed me how close or similar the two are. When I was young, I was told than protestants were wrong and going down the wrong path. I came to the realization that they are God loving humans and try to do the best they can to lead a good life. We have attended many denominations during this period have realized that they are all Christians.  

Finally, I experienced a near death experience last February. I thought I breathed my last breath and was prepared to meet the maker. I must have passed out but somehow the doctors revived me, and I started to feel better. How long I was out I will never know. This tale can be read at “My Blood Clot”. All tests and lab work show that there was no long-term damage and the chances of surviving more years are good. I am now at ease of death, and I am confident there is more after death on this earth. I am convinced that God loves us unconditionally and Christ died for our sins. The hard part to accept is that God loves the bad guys unconditionally and Christ died for their sins too.