Ever wonder why you are attracted to someone, more than someone else? I have wondered about that through my years. It must be more than just physical even though that plays a part in some parts of life. In my opinion, interaction between other humans is the most important segment of our lives. Memories are built from these contacts we have throughout our life. Friendships, marriages and unfortunately enemies come from human interactions. As life continues you meet a large quantity of people. A relation is started when two people are attracted to each other. I am not an expert. I am just quoting my experiences and opinions.
As you begin to grow up your world expands. You meet neighbors, new people from church gatherings and school that expands your life. Why was I attracted to Doris the neighbor from Lola. I do not have a clue. All the boys in first grade had a crush on Miss Lee the first-grade teacher. Our hearts were broken when she married the math teacher. In second or third grade I met Sandra. She was special. I was attracted to her, and she was attracted to me. We were very close friends through elementary and junior high and most of high school. What happened is a story for another publication.
As you continue your life you may find out that the attraction that someone shows to you may have selfish reasons. For example, I went into the army and was shipped over to Germany for almost two years. In an orientation meeting we were warned that many of the German young women will do anything to get a ticket to America. That included lying to you, sex and getting pregnant. This wasn’t attraction, this was a planned plot to get to America. You may be attracted to her, but she may just be desperate to improve her life. One had to be very careful.
For close to twenty years, I hired and fired hundreds of employees for a large corporation. This included women to work in an office environment. On rare occasions during the interview the prospect would offer services outside of the office to get the job. This wasn’t attraction, this was desperation to get the job. That killed her possibility of becoming hired. Qualifications are important but I also found out attraction is also an important part of the decision process. This also applies to male applications. I don’t mean sexual attraction. All my life I have been a normal healthy male and have not had any sexual attractions to my fellow males. I also consider ease of conversations to be a part of the attraction. Some individuals are so easy to have a conversation and continue the conversation. Others, not so easy. Eye contact is also important. I was surprised how many could not look you in the eye during the interview. It made me think, “what are they hiding from me?” I discovered I had more success in hiring individuals that had this attraction and would stay on the job for a longer period of time.
There is physical and sexual attraction. Those hormones are powerful chemicals affecting your decisions and your body. Most humans are driven to marriage or having a significant other. Most want to leave the legacy of children. That is just life. Most healthy males enjoy the eye candy offered by the sight of the human female. I would speculate females are attracted to the male eye candy available too. So, you go through life, and maybe get married or find a significant other. But these physical attractions are still knocking at your front door. Do you stay loyal or let temptation take over? That is a decision you must make throughout your hormone driven years. Been there done that. Yes, it is tough to decide at times what avenue do you want to travel down. Feelings and hurt can be devastating. I remember telling my sons when their hormones were starting to flow. “Son, don’t let your hormones lead your life, there are other important things in life, that must be considered, such as compatibility, comfort, trust and love.” I guess it helped, they both appear to be happy with their lives and relationships.
I also discovered there can be attractions in the cyber world too. I have been on twitter, now X, since 2010 and have acquired over 5000 followers and I follow around the same amount. Most are silent but there is the small amount that you start conversing quite often and the attraction starts to emerge. In many cases you do not have a clue what they look like because many use avatars instead of actual photos and they are spread all over the country. You can tell the gender by name, but the eye candy luxury feature is not there, and you do not know the age gap. After some conversations you can figure out the age gap though. Now I am fantasying that it would be nice to meet these attractions face-to-face and see if the attraction is real. I am quite sure this will never happen though.
Have you ever considered that these attractions may happen more than just coincidence? Do you meet these people for some unexplained reason? Are you meant to learn something from these attractions? Many times, I have the feeling that I meet a person for a reason. Of course, the reason for this encounter is the difficult part to figure out. Life has been an adventure and there must be a reason for this life of many learning experiences.
In conclusion, I more than likely will never know why I am attracted to someone and not another. This is just one of those mysteries of life that will never be answered. It has been interesting writing about it though.


